Six Questions

I took part in an assertive communication training today. What I enjoyed most was the way we had to introduce ourselves to the rest of the group. It was by answering the following six questions. I'm going to leave it here in case someone would like to answer them. They reveal so much about a person and I'm really curious what some of your answers would be.

1) What sport would you be yours in the Olympic Games if you were a professional sportsman/woman?
(Me: Fencing. I think it is as beautiful as a dance, artistic and powerful. It also has great traditions in my country.)
2) What's your best way to start your day?
(Me: sitting on my sofa in my pyjamas, sipping a cup of coffee, listening to the radio and giving myself time to wake up.)
3) What book would you really like to read?
(Me: East of Eden by Steinbeck. I had this book on my bookshelf for at least 15 years and for some reason I have never got round to reading it but always wanted to.)
4) What is it you would like to rid the world of?
(Me: children suffering from hunger, thirst, wars, abuse.)
5) Where would you like to travel?
(Kilimanjaro in Tanzania)
6) Which of your weaknesses would you like to get rid of?
(Me: judging people too easily.)

I found a secret on PostSecret that made my heart miss a beat

Dear Gingerman,

I am not ready to feel the way the writer of this card felt. I wish you could prove me wrong and make me fall madly in love with you this Christmas. It's either that or I must move on. Otherwise I know I will end up with the same terrible secret and a deep regret in my heart.

Post Transylvania

It's been 3 days since I returned from my trip in Transylvania. I travelled with Gingerman and we spent 10 days together, which was the longest ever time for us. I have been trying to write something since my return but words zig-zag in my mind and they don't seem to make their ways to my fingertips to be typed down.

The trip was like a fairytale.

The two of us together a disappointment.

A very negative start of the new year.

This is the strangest photo of the trip and I want to post it in case I will never find the inspiration to share more of the wonders of that mysterious land. The photo is not photoshopped and in no way modified at all. It was like this in real life: a black and white forrest of pines and a blue sky. Frozen in silence, waiting patiently for the rest of the colours arriving with Spring.

Renovations

I have a feeling I won't be writing for a while. Writing and being well are two things that go hand in hand for me. I have never found help in jotting down the mess that's in my soul. If anything it makes me even more frustrated when I face my own incapacity of wording some of my feelings.

For me writing this blog is a way to practise a little bit of creativity to compensate for the dull job I do day by day. And creativity comes when I feel whole. When I have plans. When I'm not kept awake at night by fear or sadness.

The truth is there is something more to it. Gingerman came across my blog last night and read it. I think apart from the pain he felt at what he read he probably didn't understand why I wouldn't communicate some of my feelings to him, but rather, to an invisible audience. I'm very sorry about that. It is time the two of us figured something out together and the way it will be done should not be through coded messages on a blog.

So, until I manage to sort myself a bit I will probably remain a reader and not a writer. Happy writing to everyone, I will be back!

Irritation of the Day

(Right. Here is the thing. I said I would not write for a while but I have changed my mind. (Is that cheering in the background?!) Gingerman might think it was a catch for him to stop reading the blog, but actually, I have only just thought of that. (Thinking of it now: not a bad idea at all.)

What happens is this: 2 years ago I went through a rough period when I stopped writing. It was nothing out of the ordinary really (self-loathing, self-pitying, shit-bottling, a time of anti-creativeness). But then when the feelings were gone the writing still would not return. I didn't trust that I could possibly post anything of any value or interest. I was thinking about it today and decided not to repeat that time. I will try and bring some life back into the medio pomelo, which, sadly, has been drying up recently. )

The topic I wanted to write about is gonna be something as little related to my love-life as possible, at least for now, and sorry for the disappointment. I wanted to write about unsolicited advice and this colleague of mine whose name is M.
M is a nice girl. She is bubbly, knowledgeable, trustworthy, hardworking, happily married and badly overweight. Still, she has the self-confidence to give expert advice to ANYONE in the office canteen on the right eating patterns, healthy and unhealthy diets, good and bad fitness regimes. (Good for her, I would love to say, but I can't because I'm too annoyed. She does spoil my meals on a regular basis!!!) She doesn't do it in a nasty way or anything but she loves to CORRECT us all, lost individuals who are
-following a new diet
-trying to cut down on meat
-trying to cut down on carbohydrates
-vegetarians
-don't follow any patterns at all.

The list could go on, she has a word of unsolicited advice to ANYONE who eats ANYTHING. I also must admit she does know a lot of stuff about minerals and proteins and calorie count but… her advice brings the worst irritated bitch out of me because a) I never asked for her advice and b) it sounds so wrong coming from her. It's like the alcoholic psychologist who tries to help someone fight their addiction or the impotent neurologist who provides mental and physical support to the impotent. Or it could be me going around and telling everyone how to have a fulfilling and successful relationship...

Maybe I'm wrong and these are the right people for that sort of help. After all, they ARE the subject matter experts themselves for having been there, facing the problem for real. But somehow I don't believe them.

I feel nasty I wrote this. Especially knowing that surprise guests can turn up on the doorstep of my blog for a good old read. But it is something that has been bugging me for a while. And all the assertive-communication training in the world would not enable me to ask her in a politically correct and constructive way to stop giving me diet advice as long as she doesn't look fit to do the job.

100% Pure Happiness...

...is what I saw on my nephew's face last night when I let him use my snorkeling gear in the bath. He checked the water for octopus, he looked for Nemo, he whispered me in the know-it-all voice of children that he had just seen a whale and that fortunately there were no sharks at all.

100% Pure Happiness does come for free after all. Silly me, saving up all that money for my next diving trip to Thailand!

Saturday Night Pixels

Last night I saw an exhibition called Pixels which I would like to share with you.

It showed the works of young Hungarian artists, among others, my friend Aron's paintings.



Here is a small selection of what he does, I think it is authentic, super-cool stuff.

I love the intensity of his pictures, there is so much going on, so many colours, shapes, patterns, fun. Pop-graffiti-comic strip coctails. They do have a cheer-up effect on me.

Also, I realised that size does matter, at least in art for sure. Seeing the original ones as big as they are does make a very different impression from seeing them in a photo.

My favourite is the one above, with the half manga face. Which one do you like best? Cast your vote, I'm curious to know!

Anyways, enjoy the pictures and spread the word that there is a young artist out there worth looking at (and investing into...)

If you would like to know more visit http://www.hidvegiaron.hu